Raised from the dead

No I am not a zombie. Well you can say I have been restored in more ways than one. Today, I realized I've been through many lesser deaths in my life. There are many things before that I'd rather forget and keep under the cover and start anew. But in my attempt to discern what it is I am made to do, I have to bring to light the past. In my younger years, my temperament and disagreeable attitude towards misunderstanding and confrontation had made me pay a high price. In my past life, when my buttons are pushed, I push back really hard in more ways than one. I consider it lesser death, because as I move on, I leave familiar faces behind never to see them again, leave the routine, never pass that road to work. A lesser death of sorts because I want to bury it in the past and just move on. But today I was made to realize that these experiences of hurt, confrontation, misunderstanding, and sense of loss has made me the person I am today. These same things that I tried to forget are my hidden sources of strength and inspiration to be a better person. This new life I have now is a result of those lesser deaths but within this perspective, it feels like I've been raised from the dead.