I love Weddings

Two sundays ago, we attended a wedding of good friends Ryan and Cherry. I love attending weddings as I always feel excited dressing up and looking forward to see the bride at her most beautiful. Anticipating to meet common friends, brothers and sisters.



Weddings are always a celebration. A new start and a blessing. Being able to witness this particular wedding came as an affirmation for me of our own. It was like being reminded of a time that you made the same vows to each other--for richer or for poor, in sickness and in health--- they also made personal vows to each other. Once again after almost two years it was a joy to be reminded.

Smiles that truly come from the heart as you can see in these images.



Congratulations Ryan and Cherry! May God bless indeed your new life together.

SP

SP is for special problem. No I am not having another anxiety attack. I am actually been writing my SP for my ENRM 290 -- this is the equivalent of a "thesis" and been draining my soul and energy the past days. I hope baby still has some left because when I finished last night's revision on Chapter 4 of results and discussion, I realized my feet were swollen and I am bit shaking from cerebral exhaustion.

This SP is the last requirement for me to finally graduate from Open U. I have a mock presentation at my adviser's office at DOST in Taguig on April3 then the actual presention of the SP at UPOU HQ in UPLB on April 8th. I guess i have to ask my OB again for this but it is now or never I guess--when baby arrives goodbye all school work. Why do we do the things we do?

On top of this the heat is giving me a sauna session every day (which I think is not really good for baby).

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to ponder

"I was spellbound at becoming a mother. How could God trust me so?"

--Barbara Gordon, Chappaqua, New York

At the speed of thoughts passing through me in a day, about work and family, about this season of introspection, I realized that my hands cannot keep up with my own musings.

There are alot of pondering that I wanted to share, the bliss of being an expectant mom and twin anxiety that comes along with all the emotional and physical transformation that my body and spirit is going through. I guess words won't be enough to express the many things that I am going through right now.

I also realized that this is a special time to reflect. Lent is also a time to reflect. Internal and external reflections that I pray would help me be guided in this path before me. I will only be going through this for nine months and this last few months esp this month I want to reflect on the many transformations that I am immersed upon. Share these thoughts and insights that are blessings in themselves.

A nanay book

I got the picture from this site.

I found this book in one of the sale (a huge hardbound book for less than $3 or 149 pesos only)at SM Makati, while I intended to go to Powerbooks to look into some books that would give me a boost of inspiration and deeper insight on being an expectant mother, I stumbled upon this book right at the center of SM Makati upon disembarking the MRT station and walking towards GB3. It was once again an unexpected blessing and of a book finding its way to me.

The opening verse of the book:

"At every child's birth, a mother is born"

Mga Bulaklak

International Women's Day today

I tried to look back about International Women's Day and how it started and found this:

An international celebration of education and empowerment

Around the world, International Women's Day (IWD) marks a celebration of the economic, social, cultural and political achievements for women.

The first IWD was held on 19 March 1911 in Germany, Austria, Denmark and further European countries. German women selected this date because in 1848 the Prussian king had promised the vote for women. Subsequently over one million leaflets calling for action on the right to vote were distributed throughout Germany before IWD in 1911. Now IWD is always celebrated on 8 March and is an occasion marked by women's groups around the world. This date is also commemorated at the United Nations and is designated in many countries as a national holiday. Women in every country, often divided by ethnic, linguistic, cultural, economic and political differences, come together to celebrate this important date that represents equality, justice, peace and development.

http://www.internationalwomensday.com/about.asp

I was just pondering on some things. I was thinking how to express my own thoughts about women in the Philippines today. I guess I was stirred by what happened at Welcome Rotonda when Risa Hontiveros-Baraquel was arrested today during a rally that aims to call attention to women's rights.

We have a president that is a woman. Let it be on record here-- that I did not vote for her. In hindsight, I am glad that I followed my woman's intuition at that time.

Isn't it ironic now celebrating women's day, that women's right to express themselves are violated. Ironic that we have the right to vote, but we have a woman seated in "power" who doesn't seem to understand the long history of struggle of women. A global historical development that in part has helped her to be where she is now.

Interesting trivia...that these things happened at a time of the lenten season when the theme color of which is purple.

Purple is also the international women's color.

The Mural in UP

Picture from INQ7.
back home, things seem to be the same, I am amazed that the streets were quiet. But I guess nothing is really what it seems.

Seemingly calm surroundings cannot mask nor contain the fire that is burning in the hearts of the Filipinos.

This image says it all...

On my way back home

On our way to Denpasar Airport to fly back home I saw this woman ahead of us. I thought this was a beautiful image of how a woman balances strength, grace, and beauty. Doing our daily chores with aplomb.

It is also an image of being on the road and going back home.

engraved in wood and stone

On the trip to the western side of the island near Tanah Lot I saw these beautiful wood carvings




Below, while walking the streets of Sanur I saw these beautiful stone carvings

Images of Bali

These pictures were taken at Tanah Lot which is considered as one of Bali's most important coastal temples.

Darurat Nasional di Filipina

This is the headline here today of the Bali Post. That our dear country was in a state of emergency on the 20th Anniversary of the EDSA Revolution.

It is sad to read emails and newsupdates from INQ7 seeing the crowd giving flowers to the soldiers that image transported me to an old memory that even at a young age at that time was a memory to be part of a country whose people care for their mother land.

Just 30 minutes after the state of emergency we were informed here in our workshop. I thought we really are now a global village. In a matter of an hour I read blogs of friends, emails from friends and online versions of broadsheets with just a click I was virtually there.

It is really a sad time para sa Pilipinas.

Where we are at Bali

Singapore

The orchid garden at Singapore airport. Our flight to Singapore was delayed last sunday and spent a good amount of time waiting in line. Patience is being tried as always. I guess one thing that usually comes with age is that people start to "mellow" and in some ways grow in patience for glitches like this happen. Traveling I think makes you grow in patience and look at things in a better and wider perspective.

My compass

Today is a bit frantic, for I will be leaving for Singapore at 2PM today then later onwards to Bali, Indonesia. My head is aching and I am worried with the condition of our baby in my tummy but am reassured by two doctors who gave me the "go" signal for this business trip to Bali of 10 days. I'll be on the road for a while again.

Thank God that Amats and I were able to hear mass at Claret early today 7:45 rather than our usual 11AM. I just felt a bit more grounded. "Clinging on my compass" so to speak for the many directions that life and work is bringing me, I still hope and rely only on His grace to pull me through and give me direction.

Again my favorite author Fulghum comes to mind about clocks and compass. Like him I'd rather wear a compass than a watch on my wrist. Time is relative it passes by so quickly, countries have different time and people have different idea of time. But a compass gives you direction--but you need to have a bearing. I pray that God remain my true north. That He may always stir me towards the direction He wants me to take.

I consider this trip as a gift because I've always wanted to see Bali and experience the unique Balinese culture. Like my friend Mayang during her pregnancy she was still able to visit Europe for a vacation. I thank God for this blessing and opportunity.

35 years!

Three decades and five years. I can't believe it when I woke up today and that is my new year's age. How does it feel to be 35 years old? I really do not feel much older than before. It has been great the past years, there were ups and downs but still great. I'm thankful for all those years that shaped me today, all the places I've lived in (Alaminos, Los Banos, Tawi-Tawi and Palawan), all the unique places that I've visited (Kathmandu, Okinawa, Auckland, Brisbane, GBR, Madang, Tubbataha and many more), and all those who have stood by me through these years (you know who you are) - friends who gave me shelter and family who loved me for who I am. And the community that helped me renew and deepen my relationship with the One who loved us first! Thank you Lord for all Your blessings. Thank you for the gift of life.

I am looking forward to the coming years, of growing old gracefully. I still want to climb mountains, travel to unique places and dance until those golden years. Well it is not really my golden years yet but I understand when one of my friends said that we should celebrate growing old. There are many things that gets better with age, wine, cheese and other inner strengths and traits that can come only with the molding of the years.

At mass today, the final blessing was "go forth and continue to hunger for a better life". A message of hope that things could actually be better and to believe and yearn for that as your prayer was the residual feeling I carry from that blessing.

This year a diffent kind of realization of inner celebration came upon me. It is the first time in many years that I have come to really, really appreciate growing old.

"Thank God for you"

"I thank God for you"... everyday since we got married this is the short affirmation I say to my husband in the evening before sleeping and when I wake up in the mornings. An affirmation and prayer in one said everyday. Let me say it here to honor you my beloved "I thank God for you Amats".

*********

We do not really observe valentine's day and I was thinking of my blog entry of our non-observance of this day remembering our couple friends who make it a point not to date on this day. And after getting married I do not really expect anything special to happen. But after waking up this morning to a table of flowers and heart shaped donuts in pinks and reds I was really happy to be on the receiving end ( now thinking about it I do appreciate this things however cheesy! hehehe). Receiving the unexpected is experiencing His grace.

St. Valentine, Phil, Eros and AGape

I never thought that St. Valentine was a priest until today when I googled the History of Valentines Day. I guess I didn't look him up years before--I just had this idea that he is just one of those fictional characters and another form of Valentino ha!

Anyway, I was also thinking of doing a discourse about the many forms of love but I think there is enough here in the web to update you on that so I'll just refer you to this "Short Handbook on Love".

Lauds

Last weekend, we spent some time with close friends Melo and Jas. Since Melo needs to prepare for a talk the coming week he needs to go to LST in Ateneo to get some material. We tagged along Amats and I, spending a warm afternoon with friends. The JesCom shop was closed and I just kept looking at the all the nice readings and wonderful CDs-- silently inside I've been wanting a Lauds album but never had one.

Something good came up, we met Alan and told us as there was a talk and that the Lauds Seven album will be launched that afternoon. The shop was closed because there was a set up downstairs for the launch. Since I came in my slippers with no money Amats and I decided we cannot afford to buy the album.

All the while on the side Jas bought CDs and tapes. Later in the car, she gave a copy of the Lauds Seven CD as a gift to us. "Awww...thanks" was my reaction, as I did not really expect it. I was really happy and felt that God blessed this small unspoken wish. Now as I write and listen to the CD, I felt His warm reassuring embrace that I am His daughter.

fatigue

This bit of information page 114 from "What to expect when you're expecting", helped me get through my first trimester:

The concern is: "I'm tired all the time. I am worried that I won't be able to continue working."

Answer: "It would be surprising if you weren't tired. In some ways, your pregnant body is working harder even when you are resting than a nonpregnant body is when mountain-climbing..."

Sigh, no wonder.

Team Diesel

One of my last major climb (major climbs being multi-day climbs at least 3 days walk up the mountains at a certain elevation) I remember leading a team. There were 3 of us and the two team mates Xiel and Richelle are both newbies but strong and determined. Team Diesel that is what we call ourselves because we realized, we were really slow at starting up, always starting cold, walking at the slowest pace among the other teams... but eventually our winds will find us and will be walking with ease and catch up with the others. The joy of every climb is not just reaching the summit, it's each step taken, each breath, the trek, the journey and the revelations that the mountain has for the one who takes time to look and smell the pine trees.

I am writing this piece to acknowledge how really slow I am at the start of things, the year itself. This year, although is the second month already just seems to be beginning. No resolutions. I guess I never ever did stick to any if ever i thought of doing things differently. One of my favorite writers Robert Fulghum writes about thinking of all the good things done last year, put it in a list and label it as his last years resolutions. I think we have the same wavelength for I agree on that one indeed.

Slowly the year is just beginning--- as always I am full of hope that things will get better for each passing year. Looking back, it has really been great specially the past year.

Recently I posted here the year of the dog pics to remind me that "Hey! it is New Year already!" it is also fun to celebrate with our Chinese bros and sis they always look forward to prosperity and all that Chinese jazz.

Slowly cleaning my drawers, uncluttering our house and inner thoughts, finding my bearing, hoping for the best, nothing written on paper, prayers in my heart, breathing the air, walking at ease, knowing that He is leading the way is enough for me.

I believe it will be a good year.

Its the year of the dog

Happy New Year!

A book found me

The sky was overcast and light rain drizzled. After my appointment with the pulmonologist a week ago, we passed by a nearby second hand book store Books for Less along Roces Ave. While we came just to look for paperback and some good read, a book found its way to me. I am amazed how things manifest itself when you need them.

There is an old saying "when the student is ready, the teacher arrives".

Dinner with Mayang

It has been years since I spent some time with my really good friend Mayang. Since she migrated to the States in '99. She went home a couple of years ago with Isabella and this year we got to meet the latest addition to the family Dylan.

Thanks Dylan for all the gifts. Mayang said that being a parent to a child is one of the most selfless thing a person can do.

Mayang is one of my most cherished friends. We climbed mountains together, trained together as we are batchmates in a school mountaineering club before in the mid-90's. Even though now that our home are literally oceans apart and family and work has kept us busy, we kept in touch. It doesn't matter that there were time of long absence of emails and letters but when we get together, it feels as if it was just yesterday that we were spending an afternoon sharing tea and updating each other of our latest adventures.

Good friends are really for keeps, no matter where they are.

“Thank you, Lord, for the friends you have given to me. Help me to cultivate these relationships, and to set you as their foundation. May we all discover your presence and your blessings through one another.” from Word Among Us

the blessing of friends

Last Jan 5, just the day before Mayang and family flew back to the US, we had dinner at Cafe Bola at GB3 with El, Earnest, Buddy and Veda, and of course Amats. Mayang brought 2 month old baby Dylan.





Amats playing around with Veda and Buddy taking pictures.


Isabella Mayang's eldest(who looks like a mini vogue model in her pink dress)first thing Veda said upon meeting her "can you skip?" and went about skipping around GB3 showing us her new skill.

Our most jolly meal!

Early this January just before we went back to Manila, we treated the kids to a trip to Jollibee to the nearest city. This is one of my most enjoyable time. This is the first time ever that I had my picture taken with Jollibee. You could see Genuine's eyes sparkle and I guess it rubbed on all of us as she plays around. One of the happiest moment a grown up can experience is to re-connect again with our inner-child. These children that we are with are not worry-free they been through real hard times and pain that some of us adults haven't experienced in our lives. But spending time with them and playing with them, as they let go of these concerns and believing they are cared-for. A degree of abandonment of worries knowing that the divine is at work in their lives. I could only guess that these are one of the reasons that God loves His children.

Spending time with old friends

The recent holiday gave us all a chance to spend time with family and friends. I just love the simple life. Simple things makes me really happy like gardening with friends, swapping plants for our own yards. Spending time talking and catching up on one anothers lives-- I love the laid back life and spend a lazy afternoon with friends at home (not in the aircon mall--I am not a mall animal) I love cooking for friends and eating home made mini pizza on pita bread.

Last December I caught bad cold that complicated my breathing that I had to be brought to the ER of East Ave Medical and missed baby Jane's party at Jollibee. But when I spent some time in Laguna, my colds slowly cleared up with the fresh air. I miss the trees around the old house. We spent time just swinging on the hammock and playing with the new puppy Brownie (don't ask me I didn't name the dog hehehhe).

Bakasyon sa Probinsya

Media Noche 2006!

Welcoming the New Year with a potluck of sorts Media Noche includes grilled liempo, chicken, cocktail hotdogs and vienna sausages with marshmallows for the kids, ham, carbonara which the kids did not recognize hehehe, buko salad and a donated crumbly cake we dressed with mallows.

Even if were ourselves were dressed up in pajamas, and the kids still are dazed because they just woke up almost at midnight, the cooks smelled of charcoal and kitchen scent all were very happy to welcome the new year!

I guess every family hopes to be gathered around good food sharing it with loved ones and friends. Hoping and praying that this joy can be tucked in our pockets to share the morsel each day of the year.

Araw ng Pasko sa Alaminos

On Christmas Day after morning mass, we traveled to Alaminos, Laguna. As far back as I can remember I always spend Christmas Day at the ancestral house in Alaminos. In the past, my main reason to spend Christmas Day there is to be with Inay and Lola Abeng. Inay and Lola have gone but even now, I make the traditional visit together with Amats to the old house now transformed into a foster home for children waiting for adoption. It is managed by a family we trust Aling Nimfa and family who has been with our family for more than 12 years. The kids are Ricric a special child, then John Eudes aka Dagul and the little lady Genuine is from Bantay Bata who recently replaced Giselle and Maricris who are both now in the US. This year we brought toys and gifts and foodies to celebrate Christmas with them

Pasko sa Santiago

We spent Christmas Eve at the Santiago household with Jinky, Julius, Baby Jane, Vico, Dad, Tito Philip, Rhea, RJ and the whole family of the Jaboli's Nanay Bacion, leah, Niknik and other guest.

It was happiest for the kids specially during the gift giving and gift opening they were happily surprised with all the toys. Julius with the rc and the light sparkled in rj's eyes opening the mini toy billiards. We had great food with crabs, grilled bangus, roasted chicken, crispy pata that took the whole day to prepare (Julius hoarded the crispy skin), biko and more biko, ham, sausages, for dessert Jinky's buko salad and a huge sans rival cake to top it all (if there is still room in one's belly that night).